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Day
1
Bad start to a week - got dumped on some dull island by the
Guardian after he overheard my Muppet joke. Touchy touchy.
Was
rescued by a hunky fisherman called Devon. Who does this guy
think he is going through my backpack?
Day
2
A bunch of street brats followed me around asking where the
circus was. Don't they know who I am?? Starting to miss Britannia's
freebies and hero worship.
Kept
running into walls and giant mushrooms all day long - whoever
put that metal pot on my head needs to be shot.
Zilch
all to do in Tenebrae except watch executions at the dock.
The blond dominatrix is v. hot. Would have asked her out on
a romantic date if not for the disturbing idea of the Guardian
perving at my love life from above.
Day
3
Am extremely happy to be rid of pesky Companions for a change.
As if Iolo's poetry nights and Dupre's hangovers weren't bad
enough, all that righteous whining tends to get on your nerves
after a while. "Must we do this Avatar?" "Is that virtuous
Avatar?" "Do we -have to- break into people's houses, grab
their stuff and kill the guards if they chase us Avatar??"
Day
4
Found some wicked mushrooms. Pagan not so boring after allburrrrrrghhhhmmmheehee.
Day
5
Went to the Valley for a picnic. Wow, if I haven't had a mushroom
nibble just now I'd really believe that I'm surrounded by
the giant red-blue spiders oh shit.
Day
6
Travelled to the Plateau. Jumped a lot. Thighs hurt like hell.
Had to put a stop to mushroom experiments after a red exploding
one nearly burned my foot to a crisp.
Visited
Mythran. The old bastard charges a fortune for totally useless
spells - what's the bet I'll only ever need the very last
one?
Turns
out, everyone in this place thinks the Guardian is some sort
of a savior - what a joker, that guy!
Explored
the Plateau caverns. Found a door to an add-on; I hope they'll
put some cool weapons in there for me!
Day
7
Visited Necromancers. Vividos is one boring whinger. Wah wah
Mordea took our ceremonial dagger. Wah wah we have staff shortage
- hmm, maybe it's just that the idea of living in a dusty
masoleum with your elbows buried in dead and rotting flesh
all day does not sound like a great career opportunity to
most -normal- people.
Day
8
Had a word with Aramina. Nice wench. Gave me a key to Mordea's
bedroom after I promised to set her up with Devon. Asked her
about Mordea's bed... habits, but only got giggles.
Got
the dagger. Mordea is v. pretty when asleep, but decided not
to push my luck.
Helped
out in a grisly ritual murder. Threw up my dinner afterwards.
Day
9
Ran and jumped a lot. Flying platforms v. annoying.
Got
yelled at by Lithos. Stupid rockface. Nicked The Heart of
the Earth from some temple or other - that will show him.
Day
10
What a waste of a day. Was sent on a Pilgrimage, with a promise
from Vividos of like a totally awesome mind-blowing experience
dude (what could it be, some special mushrooms maybe?). Instead,
spent the day ducking giant spiky rolling balls and talking
to some daft old statues.
Day
11
Mordea took a tumble off the docks after a screaming match
with Devon. Damn it, should have taken my chance while she
was around.
Day
12
Released Hydros today after she promised to teach me the walk-on-the-water
party trick Devon acts so smug about. Ungrateful bitch didn't
even say thank you.
Day
13
Completed Theurgy Training Course a couple of hours after
arriving at Argentrock Isle - go me!
Had
fun all day with the "Hear Truth" spell; got enough dirty
secrets to blackmail just about everyone in Tenebrae. So none
of that "let's lynch the bastard for releasing Hydros", all
right people?
Talked
to Stratos. She's not that bad.
Stole
The Breath of Wind from Stratos, thus sending Pagan's entire
healthcare system spiralling down the drain. Oh well, they
can always convert the monastery into casino or something.
Day
14
Went to see the Sorcerers. Boring place, some good barbecue
spots around though.
Bane
is hot hot hot. Beren will probably kill me if I try anything.
Getting
fed up with the Guardian's ceaseless taunting. Ok, so he's
tearing Britannia apart, does he have to rub it into my face
every five minutes and spoil my vacation?
Day
15
Bane is still not trying to seduce me. What's wrong with her
for crying out loud??
Ran
into Arcadion, who pretended he didn't recognise me. Just
wait until the Isle of Fire, pal.
Day
16
Jumped a lot. Summoned Pyros today. Looks like a second-hand
Balrog if you ask me.
Killed
Malchir. My, do these Sorcerers suck at hand-to-hand combat.
Keep your fancy fireworks guys, nothing beats mindless hacking
and slashing in my book.
Day
17
Became the Titan of Ether. Yay me! I bet these new powers
will be very handy once I'm back in Britannia.
Finally
left Pagan, leaving behind a trail of death, destruction and
social upheaval; ie, business as usual.
Day
18
WTF??? One minute I'm standing on the top of a mountain, the
next one I'm in my bed on Earth with Hawkwind's voice ordering
me around. Oh well, I'm sure they'll explain everything.
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